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The facts and inter- connections I then presented, on the basis of my many years of practice, have lost neither in validity nor, unfortunately, in immediacy. On the other hand, what has radically changed is my hopeful attitude toward psychoanalysis, from which, in 1988, I officially broke away by resigning from the Swiss as well as the International Psychoanalytical associations.

I was forced to take this step when I realized that psychoanalytical theory and practice obscurethat is, render unrecognizable the causes and consequences of child abuse by (among other things) labeling facts as fantasies, and, furthermore, that such treatments can be dangerous, as in my own case, because they c em en t th e co nf us io n de ri vi ng fr om ch il dh oo d in st ea d of resolving it. Ten years ago I was not yet so clear about this, my study of philosophy as well as my training in and practice of psychoanalysis having long prevented me from recognizing many facts. Only when I was prepared to end my repression, to liberate my childhood from the prison of pedagogic notions and psychoanalytical theorieswhen I rejected the ideology of forgetting and forgiving, allied myself with the abused child, and, thanks to my therapy, learned to feeldid I gradually discover my hitherto concealed history. I have described my path to this history and to my new insights in books published after 1985. My first three books mark the beginning of this development, for it was only as I was writing them that I began systematica lly to explore childhoods, including my own. It was thanks to my work on those books, and later also thanks to the success of a carefully and systematically uncovering therapy, that I could see what, despite my critical attitude toward the drive theory, still had remained concealed from me during the twenty years of my analytical practic e.

I owe this information to my readers because I have learned from their letters to me that, unfortunately, some individuals, after reading my earlier books, decided to undergo psychoanalytic al training or treatment, assuming that my views as expre ssed therein reflect ed the view s of cont empor ary analysts. This assumption is completely erroneous and misleading. The teaching structure of psychoanalysis has remained unchanged over the past ten years, and I have not met a single person who, having assimilated the insights of my books, would still be willing to describe herself or himself as a psychoanalyst. Nor in my view would this be possible, since a therapist who has gained emotional access to her or his childhooda process that I regard as essentialcannot remain blind to the fact that it is precisely this access that psychoanalysis prevents at all costs. Whenever I amfrequently and mistakenlydescribed as a psychoanalyst, it is only because I do not always hear about it in time to correct such a notion.